This post was originally published in 2014 · Jacob M Hansen

There are some places on this earth that carry with them a spirit of tranquility, power, and age.  For me, there is something special about hiking through the morning mists or letting the sea wind blow through your hair as waves crash around you.  Whether I’m on the tip of a mountain, in the middle of a desert valley, or simply outside my house in the early morning hours, my problems seem to dwindle and my life becomes richer.  

And then, there’s the rest of life: always hustling here and there with deadlines, problems, people, and a non-stop barrage of information.  With our jobs, school, social activities, houses, smartphones, computers, TVs, radios, traffic signs, etc., we are feed a constant stream of stimulus throughout nearly every waking minute of the day.  We, as a people, have never been so informed and interconnected. 

Now this all good of course–it has exponentially increased our influence and opportunity–but any good thing can become overused, even to the point doing damage.  So like many others, I’m going to tell you to get off your phone. But there’s more than that. I’m not just going to tell you that you need to have real and meaningful connection with other people.  Because what you really need, is to go be alone. 

And I mean really alone.  Without your friends, your technology, your music, your books, and your dog.  Just you and your thoughts. Almost an unheard of idea, right? Well it’s a very important one that we should all act on.  Let me tell you why. 

Clarity of Mind

I don’t think it is any stretch to say that our society thinks less independently than past generations.  I say this because while we have the same capacity for thought, there is so much going on around us, so much information available, and so many people with strong opinions, that most of the time we’re responding and reacting to stimulus, and the rest of the time it’s just very hard to separate our thoughts from the arguments of others.

When we spend time alone on the other hand (remember, this means completely by yourself without any type of informational input), our thoughts can be unmuddled by distractions and pressures; something we desperately need in life.  Can you imagine Albert Einstein creating his theory of relativity while constantly responding to facebook notifications? Or Thomas Jefferson writing the Declaration of Independence with his friends always hanging out around him?  

Is it any wonder that the most prominent figures of religion have deliberately spent long periods of time alone?  Jesus spent forty days and nights in the wilderness, Muhammad meditated in the caves surrounding Mecca prior to founding Islam, and Buddha wandered the wild for six years seeking the meaning of life.  

When we spend time alone and unplugged, we can have more original and creative thought, think clearly, and actually listen to our own thoughts instead of letting them be drowned out by everything that speaks louder.  And if you can think clearly, you’re more likely to make better decisions and to discover truth. In fact, I have found that when it comes to the posts I write, while the topics are usually sparked by someone or something, the only time I can actually come to a conclusion about them is when I’m alone with my thoughts.  Usually as I’m lying in my bed late at night, with nothing to do but think. 

In fact, one of my most life changing experiences happened in solitude.  It was just this last April that I found myself standing in a secluded field with no one in sight, and wrapped in a cloak-like blanket against a light drizzle of rain.  I had been pacing that field and the surrounding woods for the last two hours, with nothing to do but think and admire the world around me. Finally, all my thoughts were coming together into one thrilling picture.  

You see, my purpose in seeking solitude that afternoon was to figure out what I wanted to do during the upcoming school year.  But after two hours, I had constructed a vision for the next fifteen years of my life: what I want to accomplish, and who I want to become.  That night I realized–truly–that I could (and would) make my life mean something. I didn’t know exactly how I was going to get there, but I saw exactly where I wanted to go.

Truly Yourself

It’s a well known fact that you are molded by those around you.  As we associate with others, we become more like them (exactly the reason it is so important that we choose good friends).  So I ask the question: when you’re alone, who is molding you? Is it possible that you’re molding yourself? Isn’t it fair to say that you cease becoming like others and begin to become more like your true self? 

You see, when we’re alone, we are free from all types of social pressure.  The direct persuasion of others through person, written material or media, or the indirect pressure of their presence, all fades away. 

Furthermore, we are also free from emotional influence.  Though we may sometimes overlook it, small things around us are constantly changing our emotions.  Such things as a family member having a bad day, watching a sad movie, listening to your favorite song, getting cut off in traffic, finding a hidden box of chocolate, and so on.  Whatever the situation, being alone can greatly remove these influences, thereby emotionally stabilizing us and putting us in a place to realize that our current drama really isn’t that big of a deal. 

Put simply, he who has never spent time alone has never discovered himself.  Or in the words of Arthur Scopenhauer, 

“A man can be himself only so long as he is alone, and if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom, for it is only when he is alone that he is really free.”

Seek Solitude

You don’t need to become a hermit (and you shouldn’t try to be lonely all the time–there’s a difference), but it is important that you make room for quality solitude in your life. 

Regularly schedule it.   We’re all so busy that when we’re up against the grind, time spent doing, well, nothing, is definitely going to be the first thing dropped from the list.  But remember that reality check? We can get so caught up in our lives that we don’t realize what we’re missing or even what we desperately need.  

The amount of time you should spend alone is entirely up to you.  Maybe you need 20 minutes every morning, maybe an hour every Sunday, or a week-long trip every few months.  Again, it’s up to you to find your optimal balance. You may not always be able to conveniently leave your home to roam the wilderness (in which case you could meditate in your bedroom if nothing else), but personally I have found that being alone in nature (with a touch of rain) exponentially increases the benefits I receive from solitude.  Whatever you decide, remember that if you don’t determinedly schedule solitude for yourself, most of the time, it won’t happen.   

Utilize it during a crisis.  The times we plan to be alone probably won’t always coincide with our largest challenges.  It is important that we consider seeking solitude when we come to a big fork in our life’s road, when we feel overwhelmed, and when we’re emotionally compromised (but obviously not all the time: you should be careful to not build barriers between yourself and those who can help you). 

To conclude, I can’t guarantee that you’ll suddenly become a better person by spending time alone.  But what I can guarantee is that it won’t hurt you to give it a try.  And in the whirlwind of life, it might be just the thing you’re missing.  

As Ralph Waldo Emerson once put it, 

“It is the best of humanity, I think, that goes out to walk.”

So go, and be alone.